deciphering the days

Have you heard this asian proverb before? I had not, until quite recently. ***** A farmer and his son had a beloved stallion who helped the family earn a living. One day, the horse ran away. When their neighbors heard the news, they all rushed to the farmer and exclaimed, “Your horse ran away, what terrible luck!” The farmer replied, "Maybe so, maybe not. We’ll see." A few days later, the horse returned home, leading a few wild mares back to the farm as well. The nearby townsfolk then thought differently about the situation and shouted out: “Your horse has returned, and brought several horses home with him. What great luck!” The farmer replied, “Maybe so, maybe not. We’ll see.” Later that week, the farmer’s son was trying to break one of the mares and she threw him to the ground, breaking his leg. The villagers cried, “Your son broke his leg, what terrible luck!” The farmer replied, “Maybe so, maybe not. We’ll see.” A few weeks later, soldiers from the army marched ...

Yes, I have written about this subject before. Yes, I am writing about it again. Friday was a long, frustrating, tiring, and anxiety inducing day. I had projects, responsibilities, and leadership roles that were taxing my ability to be in multiple places at once. People were depending on me for resources that were not available. Unfortunately, I never had an opportunity to decompress before bed. That night, I woke up at three in the morning. I was thinking about work and worrying endlessly. I got up around four and made a work to-do list. I slept till six thirty-ish when the cycle repeated. I worked from my home computer until ten that morning. My chest felt tight for most of the day and occasionally my heart rate would spike and thoughts would become an incoherent, jumbled mess of worst-case scenarios and unrealistic outcomes. When I did fall asleep Saturday night, my dreams were of work and I did not stay in the same sleeping position for more than a half hour at a time. Su...